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Message
re: Just got served divorce papers today
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:09 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:09 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
Don't believe all her excuses. They'll say anything to justifdy their selfishness.
Don't play nice.
Speak to attorney
Use community funds to pay of cards bearing your name. Cancel those so she can't use again.
Attorney will give you an amount for support, start paying that monthly.
Basically, start moving on and let her see that. It's your only hope. But she has to start living like her future will be
Don't try to understand how these ruthless counts think. You never will.
It's about the kids now, look ahead, don't drrown yourself with arguements from that crazy count
Don't play nice.
Speak to attorney
Use community funds to pay of cards bearing your name. Cancel those so she can't use again.
Attorney will give you an amount for support, start paying that monthly.
Basically, start moving on and let her see that. It's your only hope. But she has to start living like her future will be
Don't try to understand how these ruthless counts think. You never will.
It's about the kids now, look ahead, don't drrown yourself with arguements from that crazy count
0
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:10 am to Hammertime
quote:
Or might have gone through similar situations
Ocean is free to share his personal life experience regarding this. I won't hold my breath though.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:10 am to LSUmajek
Its threads like this that reaffirm my decision to have gotten a prenup. Sorry for your situation OP.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:10 am to Mo Jeaux
quote:
Women do initiate over 80% of divorces
is that because women have less loyalty or because men know they generally get fricked in divorces?
quote:
They are also statistically more likely to enter into relationships relatively soon after a divorce. Why is that?
that is just biology, women are designed to crave security
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:11 am to LSUmajek
Divorce is just about the worst problem in our country today.that and kids out of wedlock.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:11 am to mikelbr
This link will provide a guess of your child support payments.
LINK
If she went to counselling with you and used it as a "fix you, deflect off of me" exercise, she is uninterested in fixing whatever your problems may be.
If she was interested in staying with you she would put some effort into repair. Divorce is the final option. In her mind, she is done.
IF she is cheating, she is cheating with a dude that is pumping sunshine up her arse to get laid. He does not want her for the long term but is willing to lie to get it shined up. After 23 years and 7 kids, her unit probably makes Hope Solo's look neat and pristine. He does not want her permanently but she thinks he does. Her exit strategy does not exist.
You just need to know one thing now. Ask her if she is willing to fix this or if she is determined to go through with a divorce. The answer will decide if you keep pining for her or get down to business.
Good luck.
LINK
If she went to counselling with you and used it as a "fix you, deflect off of me" exercise, she is uninterested in fixing whatever your problems may be.
If she was interested in staying with you she would put some effort into repair. Divorce is the final option. In her mind, she is done.
IF she is cheating, she is cheating with a dude that is pumping sunshine up her arse to get laid. He does not want her for the long term but is willing to lie to get it shined up. After 23 years and 7 kids, her unit probably makes Hope Solo's look neat and pristine. He does not want her permanently but she thinks he does. Her exit strategy does not exist.
You just need to know one thing now. Ask her if she is willing to fix this or if she is determined to go through with a divorce. The answer will decide if you keep pining for her or get down to business.
Good luck.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:11 am to Mo Jeaux
quote:Link?
Well, some of these things are more likely than not.
quote:
They are also statistically more likely to enter into relationships relatively soon after a divorce. Why is that?
Got a link to these stats?
quote:
Being honest about the nature of women is not a bad thing, hyperbole aside.
Hyperbole kinda removes the honesty.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:12 am to Hammertime
quote:
Or might have gone through similar situations
a 20 something that has never been married has gone through a similar situation as a man that has been married for 23 years and has 7 kids?
what?
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:13 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
Love to here her side.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:14 am to Tiger Ryno
quote:
Divorce is just about the worst problem in our country today.that and kids out of wedlock
Do you think that is worse than people who live off of what other people earn? Those who want to get paid but refuse to work are absolutely killing us.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:17 am to LNCHBOX
Divorce is pretty fricking common, brah. Not sure if youve been living in a box or not. Most people have personal experience with divorce--whether married or not. You're certainly not more qualified to comment on this topic just because you've been married for a year
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:17 am to Hangit
quote:
This link will provide a guess of your child support payments.
LINK
Not as bad as I thought it would be for me
Do they have one for spousal support too?
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:17 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
I don't know your relationship but if I had to guess, I'd say you're probably the dominant personality in the relationship. If that's so, combined with her going "help her mom" I truly believe she's cheating on you or about to and since you're the dominant personality, she feels you would bully her if you found out...so in her mind it's better to cut and run.
Totally sucks for you and the kids if she's having a mid-life meltdown and feels the need to spread her wings.
Totally sucks for you and the kids if she's having a mid-life meltdown and feels the need to spread her wings.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:17 am to Tubedog13
quote:
WTF is this shite? If you listen to this beta's advice you'll lose all dignity and it'll take years to get your confidence back.
Guy has got 7 kids and has been married 23 years. This isn't a fricking Just For Men commercial where he's going to be out clubbing it up in 6 months. This site sometimes.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:18 am to TheOcean
quote:
Divorce is pretty fricking common, brah. Not sure if youve been living in a box or not. Most people have personal experience with divorce--whether married or not. You're certainly not more qualified to comment on this topic just because you've been married for a year
I see that deflection school has been working out nice for you.
Tell me what is wrong with my view of not jumping to conclusions.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:20 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
quote:
Man this hurts more than anything I have ever felt
The whole process was for me...I still suffer from it. Divorce is like a death of a loved one. My ex met her new husband through work and I thought that was the hardest part...I only have one child and I miss half of his life...THAT'S the hardest part.
Hang in there dude, it's hard to believe but it gets better...some of it
This post was edited on 7/14/15 at 8:21 am
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:21 am to KosmoCramer
Sorry about your news.
I will say, and it may not be you included, that we as men tend to not "listen" or pick up on subtle clues women give us as to what we can do to "fix ourselves" for them. Just a thought, because sometimes we are so busy in our lives trying to make everything the best it can be for our wife and kids, that we don't see where we may be falling short a bit.
If legit Catholic, then she should agree to counseling through the church with your priest. I hope it works out for you, but mainly for the kids. That's a lot of broken little hearts if the family had to split. Even if the wife doesn't seem to do it, keep the kids secure and first in your thoughts and actions.
I will say, and it may not be you included, that we as men tend to not "listen" or pick up on subtle clues women give us as to what we can do to "fix ourselves" for them. Just a thought, because sometimes we are so busy in our lives trying to make everything the best it can be for our wife and kids, that we don't see where we may be falling short a bit.
If legit Catholic, then she should agree to counseling through the church with your priest. I hope it works out for you, but mainly for the kids. That's a lot of broken little hearts if the family had to split. Even if the wife doesn't seem to do it, keep the kids secure and first in your thoughts and actions.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:23 am to Hammertime
quote:
The 18 months of counseling don't count as him fighting for his marriage? Only other thing he can do is turn into a complete pussy and cower to her. Once he does that, she'll hate him for that and take more advantage of him.
Irrationality knows no bounds.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:23 am to LNCHBOX
I do agree that we are only hearing one side of the story here. And, since this forum is a bunch of people with dicks, naturally we are going to hear stories about how shitty women are.
Posted on 7/14/15 at 8:24 am to TheIndulger
quote:
I do agree that we are only hearing one side of the story here. And, since this forum is a bunch of people with dicks, naturally we are going to hear stories about how shitty women are.
If an alien landed on the OT he'd think women being whores are responsible for 98% of marriage collapses.
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