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Message
re: Question about maintaining sobriety
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:51 am to RogerTheShrubber
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:51 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
Totally disagree.
IT's 100% voluntary and a lifesaver for some people. While I didn't use AA to maintain sobriety, I got a hell of a lot out of some of the meetings.
Like any large national group it can have weird cliques. Layer in troubled attendees and it seems like it can break either direction.
Surrounding yourself with people that have your best interest at heart and want to see you succeed (and have the knowledge to help you get there) is key to achieving any goals. AA is a possible spot to find those, so could be a variety of other spots but if does seem obvious to give AA a shot maybe.
0
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:51 am to HoustonGumbeauxGuy
July 10 th 2016 here
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:51 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
a lifesaver for some people.
This is complete bullshite.
AA has saved tens of millions of lives worldwide
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:57 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:AA in and of it of itself isn't a cult as an organization, people need to realize that there are tens of thousands of groups that use the 'big book' (AA bible) and some can come across as a 'cult' like by laymen I could see.
quote:
AA never worked for me. The shite is a weird cult imo.
Totally disagree.
IT's 100% voluntary and a lifesaver for some people. While I didn't use AA to maintain sobriety, I got a hell of a lot out of some of the meetings.
But AA has no doubt saved maybe a million lives over the years.....
But is isn't for anyone, and just anacdotally I can say it seems some of my more less educated type friends have used it to more success than the more free thinking or educated ones.... but sobriety goes back to 'if you want it or not' and there is no other metric that will show future success, no matter the method to get there.
Good luck OP
What i tell friends is:
"you have been getting overly fricked up and upsetting friends and family (even if you don't realize it now) for XX amount of years, give sobriety a 2-3 month chance, try a couple methods along the way. And look man, if you don't like the trajectory of where your life is headed and don't enjoy the life style, go back to the way you were before those few month, the partying getting fricked up lifestyle isn't going anywhere, go drink all the bourbon you want or shoot all the dope. Sobriety isn't for everyone, but what's so scared of giving it a try in case you like it better, I won't fault you at that point if you gave it an honest try"
Posted on 6/3/17 at 7:58 am to DeltaTiger14
For me the only way I could get a foothold on sobriety was through AA. It's hard for anybody, me included, to admit a weakness. But I have to say that I would not be sober all these years later but for what I learned and saw in AA in my early days of trying to get sober.
You seem to be ahead of where I was when I started (I went 8 years before a relapse and now 21 years) as you admit that you cannot drink responsibly. There is no need to get involved in the academic discussion of whether alcoholism is a disease, a weakness of will, or a moral failing. I know people who died while trying to figure this out. The deal is that I cannot control what happens when I drink. Alcohol affected my life in many ways for the worse. I had to come to the realization that I had a problem and have to accept personal responsibility to deal with it. I learned this in AA.
While I have not been back to a meeting in many years, I know that AA is there for me. I often think that I need to go back so that I can give back what I received from AA. I plan on doing that.
The bottom line is; do whatever you need to do to put as much time as possible between the last drink/drug and today. I am not sure that there are many options other than AA that would have given me a fighting chance to do what came very unnaturally to me, i.e., not take a drink. And while there are cliques in AA and those I call AA Nazis, it is truly the only organization that I know that wants everyone to succeed.
I wish all who are fighting an addiction the best.
You seem to be ahead of where I was when I started (I went 8 years before a relapse and now 21 years) as you admit that you cannot drink responsibly. There is no need to get involved in the academic discussion of whether alcoholism is a disease, a weakness of will, or a moral failing. I know people who died while trying to figure this out. The deal is that I cannot control what happens when I drink. Alcohol affected my life in many ways for the worse. I had to come to the realization that I had a problem and have to accept personal responsibility to deal with it. I learned this in AA.
While I have not been back to a meeting in many years, I know that AA is there for me. I often think that I need to go back so that I can give back what I received from AA. I plan on doing that.
The bottom line is; do whatever you need to do to put as much time as possible between the last drink/drug and today. I am not sure that there are many options other than AA that would have given me a fighting chance to do what came very unnaturally to me, i.e., not take a drink. And while there are cliques in AA and those I call AA Nazis, it is truly the only organization that I know that wants everyone to succeed.
I wish all who are fighting an addiction the best.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:00 am to DeltaTiger14
quote:
Do you think long term sobriety be maintained without peer groups like AA?
Yes but you need some time in AA to learn how to live sober. A rough estimate would be spending the same number of years you spent using = time spent in AA. By then your brain will have formed substantially different neuronal pathways. Then I think AA may have outstripped its purpose, however your close peer relationships should still be sober folks. Plenty of them around in church's.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:02 am to DeltaTiger14
AA helped me more from the fellowship. Listening to others stories finding out there are people like me. Being able to open up about your own problems and not be judged by your peers.
It's not a bad thing to be able to talk to others going through the same thing.
Im also dating a non drinker now and it makes things easier when she's not begging you to go get margaritas and we can do things together that doesn't revolve around getting drunk.
It's not a bad thing to be able to talk to others going through the same thing.
Im also dating a non drinker now and it makes things easier when she's not begging you to go get margaritas and we can do things together that doesn't revolve around getting drunk.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:03 am to ksayetiger
quote:
a lifesaver for some people.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is complete bullshite.
AA has saved tens of millions of lives worldwide
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:06 am to RogerTheShrubber
I was just sayong it has been a lifesaver for way more than "some" people.
Bill wilson is a SAINT in my eyes
Bill wilson is a SAINT in my eyes
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:07 am to DeltaTiger14
I am honestly shocked at how many posters here struggle with alcohol.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:07 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:this
I got a hell of a lot out of some of the meetings.
And it's about being open and an adult and taking what you would like from meetings and disregarding the others, like with other things in life an adult should do in learning experiences.
I will say I'll still stop into a meeting with friends.
And maybe this is an odd approach but I don't mind hearing the stories from some of the old Tymers in there for mainly one thing, 'I say, damn I don't want to be that guy up here in his late middle aged and not wanting to be in his situation', as bad as that sounds but it helps me.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:09 am to ksayetiger
You're reading way too much into the word.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:12 am to Geauxtiga
quote:
am honestly shocked at how many posters here struggle with alcohol.
I tend to find we have similar character defects. Alcohol is used to mask it. Abusing it fricks you up mentally and physically.
It ruins people's lives. It's a dangerous drug.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:14 am to Geauxtiga
quote:
I am honestly shocked at how many posters here struggle with alcohol.
Well it is an LSU forum
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:17 am to dgnx6
quote:
I tend to find we have similar character defects. Alcohol is used to mask it. Abusing it fricks you up mentally and physically.
It's incredibly effective.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:19 am to DeltaTiger14
The most important thing is to realize there is a problem and to seek help. There are many ways to get help, and as has already been said, do what works best for you.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:20 am to liz18lsu
There is another way. Do not drink, stop being a puss.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:20 am to SuperSaint
quote:
And maybe this is an odd approach but I don't mind hearing the stories from some of the old Tymers in there for mainly one thing, 'I say, damn I don't want to be that guy up here in his late middle aged and not wanting to be in his situation', as bad as that sounds but it helps me.
Makes, perfect sense to me, SS.
I remember the first meeting I was forced to attend. It was the lawyers meeting in D.C. After the meeting a woman came up to me and welcomed me. My response was, "I don't need this cult. I've gone 6 months without drinking many times." Instead of saying, "Well, you obviously have a problem because you were ordered here.", she said, "Good for you. Why don't you try it our way. Yo may find it easier to stay quit." I felt pretty small that I responded to her kindness with disrespect for AA, yet she was still willing to try to help me out.
In my later years I often looked at those who relapsed or sunk further than I had and realized that I could be in the exact same place (or worse) if I chose to start with alcohol again.
Pride let to my relapse in 1994. I was too embarrassed to go back to AA after a few years of doing it on my own. I know now that if I feel close to a drink there is a place I can go where there are people who are exactly the same as me.
The bottom line for me is that I know that I need help to stay sober. I am willing to do whatever it takes.
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:22 am to DeltaTiger14
Challenge yourself
Posted on 6/3/17 at 8:25 am to dgnx6
Cool to hear there are many other friends of Bill here.
I have 13 years sober. And today I don't go to a million meetings or anything. Honestly the most rewarding thing is talking and trying to help someone who's new and at their wits end.
I also would not want a go at this disease (and that's exactly what it is) alone. There's a reason the 12 steps are written in with plural pronouns.
Good luck OP!
I have 13 years sober. And today I don't go to a million meetings or anything. Honestly the most rewarding thing is talking and trying to help someone who's new and at their wits end.
I also would not want a go at this disease (and that's exactly what it is) alone. There's a reason the 12 steps are written in with plural pronouns.
Good luck OP!
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