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Started By
Message
re: Should I leave Ukraine?
Posted on 2/25/22 at 12:39 pm to sportsaddit68
Posted on 2/25/22 at 12:39 pm to sportsaddit68
quote:This. Know that you have all our support here, focus on getting to your family.
Don't do that. Don't play the what if game. You made the best decision you could at the time. You don't know the future. This invasion could have never happened. Or you could have died on the plane ride back to the states. No one knows what is in store for us. Stop beating yourself up.
0
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:01 pm to sportsaddit68
I could fly into Warsaw. I don't know what will happen after that. Some trains are still running. I could probably find a crazy taxi driver to take me for enough money. Keep in mind Ukraine is the size of Texas. Normally that trip would take about 24 hours by train and would take at least two trains. Maybe I could rent a car in Warsaw. Navigation would be difficult. I would almost certainly encounter road blocks. They will check me passport and they will detain me. Ukraine has also blown a lot of bridges to slow Russian troops.
My wife tells me that I will be detained if I come. If I make it to my wife, which I probably can't, they will detain her as well.
Legally (Ukrainian law) I will have to get a visa as well. I'm not sure if that matters now. I believe if there is a will there is way but reality is stacked against me.
I'm guessing that Russia will have control of Ukraine fairly soon. There will still be guerilla warfare but the country will be under Russian control. I still don't know if I will be get to them under those conditions. As an American I need a visa to go to Russia, Russian controlled Ukraine, who knows? Once Russia does take control, things will be safer for my family and the bombing should stop.
The most likely scenario is that Russia will take control. My wife will go live in Kiev for a few months and work on the IVF and I will try to meet her there. Our original plan was for her to start the IVF procedure in April or May and for me to fly to Kiev to join her in June. I could stay my 90 days without a visa and fly back together in Sept. hopefully with a pregnant wife.
I'm not sure what I can do at this point, as for transportation and visas.
My wife tells me that I will be detained if I come. If I make it to my wife, which I probably can't, they will detain her as well.
Legally (Ukrainian law) I will have to get a visa as well. I'm not sure if that matters now. I believe if there is a will there is way but reality is stacked against me.
I'm guessing that Russia will have control of Ukraine fairly soon. There will still be guerilla warfare but the country will be under Russian control. I still don't know if I will be get to them under those conditions. As an American I need a visa to go to Russia, Russian controlled Ukraine, who knows? Once Russia does take control, things will be safer for my family and the bombing should stop.
The most likely scenario is that Russia will take control. My wife will go live in Kiev for a few months and work on the IVF and I will try to meet her there. Our original plan was for her to start the IVF procedure in April or May and for me to fly to Kiev to join her in June. I could stay my 90 days without a visa and fly back together in Sept. hopefully with a pregnant wife.
I'm not sure what I can do at this point, as for transportation and visas.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:08 pm to N2daWild
I’m not reading through all of this and I have no idea if any of this is legit. You could be some kid in moms Alabama basement for all I know.
Why are you not staying, standing up yelling Wolverine ? I guess your wife can but shouldn’t you as well
Why are you not staying, standing up yelling Wolverine ? I guess your wife can but shouldn’t you as well
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:09 pm to N2daWild
Is there a way to reach out to the US Embassy? Maybe they can get your wife and kid out if things get rough. I know they wouldn't help you get in though.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:18 pm to sportsaddit68
They will with information only. Possible transportation routes, hotels, etc. I have already talked to the Ukrainian embassy but I need to contact the American embassy. I need information more than anything as for transportations and visas. I'm not sure if they will have answers and I imagine information could change quickly.
I'm probably just going to have to wait until Russia takes over and work out a plan then. I think Russia will have control in a week or two. Any plan I put in place now, would be subject to change daily.
I'm probably just going to have to wait until Russia takes over and work out a plan then. I think Russia will have control in a week or two. Any plan I put in place now, would be subject to change daily.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:35 pm to N2daWild
Sounds like your wife is a Russian sympathizer without saying so, and that's why you are in this predicament.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:48 pm to N2daWild
Just to clarify a few things. You started this thread asking for advice. Quite a few posters provided excellent advice which is to do everything in your power to get you and your family out of Ukraine. Also only one poster(an absolute idiot) said something about assaulting your wife and “abducting” your child.
You were implored to have a very serious conversation with your wife to explain the pros and cons of staying or leaving, with the pros far outweighing the cons for leaving. That’s what was meant by do everything in your power to convince your wife to let you take your child out of harms way. Also you mentioned that your wife was literally willing to die to try and have another child. According to you, she already has two children. She should be fully concentrated on her current children and that’s a giant red flag that her priority is to have a third rather than focus on the children she already has.
With all that said the past is now the past. Focus on contacting the American embassy and getting your family to safety. Godspeed
You were implored to have a very serious conversation with your wife to explain the pros and cons of staying or leaving, with the pros far outweighing the cons for leaving. That’s what was meant by do everything in your power to convince your wife to let you take your child out of harms way. Also you mentioned that your wife was literally willing to die to try and have another child. According to you, she already has two children. She should be fully concentrated on her current children and that’s a giant red flag that her priority is to have a third rather than focus on the children she already has.
With all that said the past is now the past. Focus on contacting the American embassy and getting your family to safety. Godspeed
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:54 pm to OldmanBeasley
Yes. Everyone suggested I take my family and leave. I'm not sure why you don't understand that was not one of my options. Great advice, but not an option. I had two options, stay or go.
Russia has been on their doorsteps for almost a year. My wife and Everyone else in Ukraine laughed at the suggestion Russia would invade.
Russia has been on their doorsteps for almost a year. My wife and Everyone else in Ukraine laughed at the suggestion Russia would invade.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 1:59 pm to N2daWild
Until you left Ukraine, it was an option. It was your job to do everything in your power to convince your wife that it’s in the best interest of your child to leave Ukraine. You keep saying no one in Ukraine thought Russia was going to invade, but almost everyone else in the world knew that they were. You had access to tons of information to create a strong argument to your wife that your child should leave with you.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:01 pm to OldmanBeasley
My wife still doesn't want to leave.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:02 pm to N2daWild
Well then God help her
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:02 pm to N2daWild
Culturally they are different.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:05 pm to N2daWild
quote:
My wife and Everyone else in Ukraine laughed at the suggestion Russia would invade.
Why were they so convinced nothing would happen? I get that troops had been there for a year with no action, but weren't they escalating that recently and mobilizing in a manner that looked like attack?
I'll be praying for your wife and little girl. My first son was an IVF baby too, it's tough going through that process. Maybe you will get lucky and not have to go IVF for the second, our second son came the old fashioned way
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:16 pm to N2daWild
It’s interesting to hear your perspective on life in Ukraine. You say your wife’s family has pro-Russian sentiments, but it sounds like they don’t have strong feelings either way. I wonder if they are representative of the majority of the Russian sympathizers. Also, you say your wife’s sister either just had a baby or is planning to. Apologies if you said already, but who/where is the father of that baby in all this?
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:24 pm to N2daWild
quote:
I shouldn't have left. I made the wrong decision.
Honestly, at the time I thought you made the right decision with all the stuff you needed to take care of. Just keep in touch and as soon as you have a chance to go back or they leave, take advantage of it
This post was edited on 2/25/22 at 2:30 pm
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:25 pm to N2daWild
wait!!
You are 53 years old and well enough to be traveling the world routinely, yet you are in a foreign country with $80 in your checking account and going home to get on disability?!
Get a fricking job that takes less energy than traveling to other continents!
And please quit trying to bring more children into this financial situation.
You are too old to be playing this whining victim game.
You are 53 years old and well enough to be traveling the world routinely, yet you are in a foreign country with $80 in your checking account and going home to get on disability?!
Get a fricking job that takes less energy than traveling to other continents!
And please quit trying to bring more children into this financial situation.
You are too old to be playing this whining victim game.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:33 pm to Nynna11
It's not government disability. It is a disability retirement, it will basically let me retire early. Unfortunately, I will be without a paycheck until it is settled. I will be fine in a few months, right now I'm living off of savings.
Posted on 2/25/22 at 2:36 pm to N2daWild
Disability retirement is what I am referring to. You are 54 years old and able bodied enough to be productive. Accept adult responsibility and get a job.
This post was edited on 2/25/22 at 2:44 pm
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