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Started By
Message
re: 12th Grade Girls Are Far Less Likely Than Boys To Say They Want To Get Married Someday
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:42 pm to kingbob
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:42 pm to kingbob
quote:
That's because women judge one-another based on their emotional labor.
What women do this? As if most women have the bandwidth to evaluate the emotional labor other women provide to other people.
quote:
Thus, they purposely make things more difficult for themselves and create more work to do in order to get positive attention from other women.
I'm going to need an example of this.
quote:I agree.
Men tend to be the opposite. They want to put forward the least effort possible while having the highest quality of life.
quote:
Women don't want low effort even if it's clean, even if it works, even if it looks good, they only feel validated if they are putting in a noticeably massive amount of effort.
This is hilarious. Women don't want to rest. They want to work harder than necessary because other women who are also working harder than necessary are simultaneously sitting around judging the amount of work other women are doing at their respective homes? What in the world?
quote:Many women disagree, obviously.
It's one of the reasons why men and women are better as a unit than they are individually.
1
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:44 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
Women are doing cost/benefit analyses of marriage and are choosing what makes more sense for their lives, which often doesn't include marriage to a man.
This thread is about 12th grade girls, they aren’t doing cost benefit analysis, they are likely parroting what they hear on social media or elsewhere.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:46 pm to Dawgfanman
quote:
they aren’t doing cost benefit analysis, they are likely parroting what they hear on social media or elsewhere.
Or they are assessing what the see at home and are deciding that's not the life they want.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:48 pm to NC_Tigah
social media has destroyed majority of girls and women
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:48 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
Or they are assessing what the see at home and are deciding that's not the life they want.
That’s possible. Many women lack the ability to make good decisions, it’s how they end up married to someone they call a child they take care of.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:52 pm to NC_Tigah
It's sad what liberal "feminism" has done to young women.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:54 pm to NC_Tigah
quote:
WTF are we doing?
Tell your kids to go into international match making so they can help bring international women over to the United States to get married since the current stock of young women have been ruined by indoctrination.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:58 pm to MrLSU
This thread is an excellent demonstration of why women are choosing to forego marriage to men.
And the advice isn't for men to improve themselves to become more palatable to women, it's that men should seek out desperate women in foreign countries with no other options to marry instead.
And the advice isn't for men to improve themselves to become more palatable to women, it's that men should seek out desperate women in foreign countries with no other options to marry instead.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 2:58 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
They want to work harder than necessary because other women who are also working harder than necessary are simultaneously sitting around judging the amount of work other women are doing at their respective homes?
Yes, yes they do. They like leisure, but they aren't comfortable in it for long. They will inevitably start changing stuff that doesn't need to be changed. Their counterpart is the male tinkerer "fixing" appliances that already worked until they don't or the retired guy who can't stop working so he just keeps starting "projects" or throws themselves into volunteering to give themselves something to do. It's not necessarily a negative trait, it's just something people do.
Women struggle to be content in their environments. It's not enough for the dishes to get done and put away in a way that is sanitary and organized, it has to be done in THEIR way. It is not enough to fold the towels to put them away, the towels must be folded in a certain pattern so that the banding wraps around. There has to be seasonal table runners for every holiday. There has to be effort and thought put into every detail to show other women that they put thought into every detail.
It can be women putting on full makeup and lining up an hour before school lets out to pick up their child rather than let them ride the bus and save 2 hours of their life. They're not doing that to save time for them. They're not doing it to save time for their child. They're often doing it to show the other moms how much they care and how "put together" they are. Women always want to host "dinner parties" where they invite close friends, cook an elaborate meal, have the house decorated perfectly and intricately plan where everyone sits and what the conversation topics will be. Guys like dinner, but they just invite those same friends over, grill something, drink beer, don't overthink it, and have just as good of a time. The extra effort is performative to show others that she puts in the effort and thinks about all these things. Effort is merely a means to an end for men.
Sometimes it is a manifestation of neuroticism manifested in controlling their environment, sometimes it is simply "keeping up with the Jones's" by trying to create this "instagrammable" perfect looking life. I'm not saying all women are like this, but every woman I have ever met in my entire life was to at least some degree.
It's not that men don't care about details, it's just that men care about different details for different reasons. Men tend to be ALL about function while women are more interested in form. For women, I have noticed, that they evaluate one another based on the amount of thought and effort that went into what they did. It's not enough for an outfit to be "cute", they have to flex that they "discovered" the different pieces at different thrift stores or upcycled by repurposing parts of other pieces. Other circles are more impressed by how much money was spent on looking that good, or how hard they hunted for a bargain. You can deny it because it's so second-nature that it's hard for women to notice them doing it, but as a man, it's so very different from how we operate, that it's impossible to ignore.
Women's end goals are often men's means to an end. It's why women's nightmares are often men's fantasies, and why men at leisure is often so triggering for their partners.
In my experience, the best way to mitigate these extreme differences in thought processes is via communication. Women need to think out "why" they want to do things a certain way and explain the thought that goes into them (which will often include a ton of factors men never even imagine). Men need to do the same. Both need to sit down and explain their thought processes, wants, expectations, needs, and processes in detail and listen to the other in detail. Then, they can compromise and figure out what division of labor and which processes work best for both of them. The man might uncover that some of the "unnecessary crap" his gf wanted him to do actually serves a really important purpose he didn't know about, and by understanding why it's so important to her, he's more motivated to do things her way. The woman might figure out that a lot of what she's doing is unconsciously trying to please other people who do not care and/or will never see it, allowing them to streamline their efforts to focus where it really counts. They might find that some of how their bf handles chores is actually incredibly efficient and clever.
The problem with our current gender wars paradigm is that everyone silos themselves online in echo chambers and never has to communicate with the opposite sex in person. They just get hyped up by people they agree with while being fed rage bait to keep them from meaningfully engaging with anyone with any other possible opinion. People are so flippant about marriage that they wed with one foot out the door and break up at the first sign of distress rather than talk about what's bothering them or even stop to figure out why it's bothering them in the first place. Why do that when they can just go on the internet and get validation from strangers who tell them there's nothing wrong and everything they do is perfect?
This post was edited on 1/5/26 at 3:08 pm
Posted on 1/5/26 at 3:19 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
Or they are assessing what the see at home and are deciding that's not the life they want.
So why did you end up like you did?
Posted on 1/5/26 at 3:47 pm to kingbob
quote:
Yes, yes they do. They like leisure, but they aren't comfortable in it for long. They will inevitably start changing stuff that doesn't need to be changed. Their counterpart is the male tinkerer "fixing" appliances that already worked until they don't or the retired guy who can't stop working so he just keeps starting "projects" or throws themselves into volunteering to give themselves something to do. It's not necessarily a negative trait, it's just something people do.
Women struggle to be content in their environments. It's not enough for the dishes to get done and put away in a way that is sanitary and organized, it has to be done in THEIR way. It is not enough to fold the towels to put them away, the towels must be folded in a certain pattern so that the banding wraps around. There has to be seasonal table runners for every holiday. There has to be effort and thought put into every detail to show other women that they put thought into every detail.
It can be women putting on full makeup and lining up an hour before school lets out to pick up their child rather than let them ride the bus and save 2 hours of their life. They're not doing that to save time for them. They're not doing it to save time for their child. They're often doing it to show the other moms how much they care and how "put together" they are. Women always want to host "dinner parties" where they invite close friends, cook an elaborate meal, have the house decorated perfectly and intricately plan where everyone sits and what the conversation topics will be. Guys like dinner, but they just invite those same friends over, grill something, drink beer, don't overthink it, and have just as good of a time. The extra effort is performative to show others that she puts in the effort and thinks about all these things. Effort is merely a means to an end for men.
Sometimes it is a manifestation of neuroticism manifested in controlling their environment, sometimes it is simply "keeping up with the Jones's" by trying to create this "instagrammable" perfect looking life. I'm not saying all women are like this, but every woman I have ever met in my entire life was to at least some degree.
I know you must have a mother, but reading this makes me wonder if you've ever met a woman before. Who has the time or bandwidth for table runners?
quote:What experiences do you base these opinions on? I couldn't even make this timing up, but my neighbor just texted me: " Hey lady what treatment are you doing on ur face? U mentioned something to me but I forgot. Cuz u look amazing"
For women, I have noticed, that they evaluate one another based on the amount of thought and effort that went into what they did. It's not enough for an outfit to be "cute", they have to flex that they "discovered" the different pieces at different thrift stores or upcycled by repurposing parts of other pieces. Other circles are more impressed by how much money was spent on looking that good, or how hard they hunted for a bargain. You can deny it because it's so second-nature that it's hard for women to notice them doing it, but as a man, it's so very different from how we operate, that it's impossible to ignore.
Me: "Thank you!! It's this alpha beta liquid exfoliant. Are you going to be home this evening? I can give one to you."
No mention of labor or cost or anything else. This is how regular, normal women communicate.
quote:
In my experience, the best way to mitigate these extreme differences in thought processes is via communication. Women need to think out "why" they want to do things a certain way and explain the thought that goes into them (which will often include a ton of factors men never even imagine). Men need to do the same. Both need to sit down and explain their thought processes, wants, expectations, needs, and processes in detail and listen to the other in detail. Then, they can compromise and figure out what division of labor and which processes work best for both of them. The man might uncover that some of the "unnecessary crap" his gf wanted him to do actually serves a really important purpose he didn't know about, and by understanding why it's so important to her, he's more motivated to do things her way. The woman might figure out that a lot of what she's doing is unconsciously trying to please other people who do not care and/or will never see it, allowing them to streamline their efforts to focus where it really counts. They might find that some of how their bf handles chores is actually incredibly efficient and clever.
I agree that healthy communication is essential for any relationship. The way boys and girls are socialized hinders this, though. Males are socialized to be less reflective than females. From the time they are little boys, males are told not to dwell or even acknowledge their feelings. They are told not to question their roles or responsibilities. They are told not examine power dynamics that benefit them.
Girls are socialized to anticipate the needs of others, talk through emotions, etc. etc.
It's not that men are incapable of reflection, it just doesn't come naturally or easily to them, imo.
quote:No arguments here.
The problem with our current gender wars paradigm is that everyone silos themselves online in echo chambers and never has to communicate with the opposite sex in person. They just get hyped up by people they agree with while being fed rage bait to keep them from meaningfully engaging with anyone with any other possible opinion. People are so flippant about marriage that they wed with one foot out the door and break up at the first sign of distress rather than talk about what's bothering them or even stop to figure out why it's bothering them in the first place. Why do that when they can just go on the internet and get validation from strangers who tell them there's nothing wrong and everything they do is perfect?
Posted on 1/5/26 at 3:52 pm to 4cubbies
“Girls just wanna have fun”
morphed into
“Girls just wanna be unaccountable whores”
morphed into
“Girls just wanna be unaccountable whores”
Posted on 1/5/26 at 3:57 pm to NC_Tigah
That’s a fickle cohort to draw lasting conclusions from. I guess we will see
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:01 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
I know you must have a mother, but reading this makes me wonder if you've ever met a woman before.
I mean, I have lived with multiple women, I was married before, I date extensively (both long term and casually), so yeah. I have "met" a woman or two
quote:
Who has the time or bandwidth for table runners?
Not me, I'll tell you that much. One of my exes was obsessed with having seasonal plates and place settings. They matched the seasonal decorative towels. I think she may have had more than a touch of OCD
With that said, she might have been the most extreme example of that, but I've yet to meet a woman who didn't have some level of that intricate nesting dynamic.
This post was edited on 1/5/26 at 4:02 pm
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:02 pm to navy
quote:
“Girls just wanna be unaccountable whores”
Being an unaccountable whore is pretty fun though, ngl
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:13 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
Women were actively recruited to work for low wages, and families needed the income.
Exactly. Feminism started in the late 1700s and it was bankrolled and astro-turfed by wealthy industrialists in the late 1800s who wanted cheap labor for their factories.
That's exactly correct.
quote:
As world wars broke out, governments and industries faced worker shortages and actively recruited women to fill roles that had been male-dominated, from manufacturing and transportation to agriculture and clerical work. This had nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with necessity and supporting war efforts.
Yes, temporarily. And about half of those women did return home after the war. Half didn't, because of the influence of...feminism. Rosie the Riveter. Flexing her rippling biceps.
quote:
Marriage isn't divorce.
That's correct. It's the end of marriage. And we institutionally encourage women to end marriage.
quote:
Marriage benefits men far more than women.
You can keep saying that, but you haven't substantiated it with anything except that women do more household chores than men. And again, it's amazing to me—particularly as a Christian—that you think disregarding God's basic foundational institution instead of simply working toward changing that one disproportionate element within that institution is the answer. How do you reconcile that with your faith?
Why isn't the answer to institutionally encourage men to follow the command to love their wives by taking on a proportionate share of household duties rather than institutionally encouraging women to "not need a man?"
Women do need men. And men need women. We were created that way. IME you ignore the Creator at your peril.
quote:
I posted one comment that was an obvious joke about parents with kids in daycare wanting free daycare.
Nah, you've posted it many times in various contexts. But let's say I'm wrong about that...I can expect no more advocacy for that policy, then?
quote:
People just look for reasons to get pissed off here.
That may be true, but no one in this conversation is pissed off. Unless you are.
quote:
Women are doing cost/benefit analyses of marriage and are choosing what makes more sense for their lives, which often doesn't include marriage to a man.
That is incorrect. They are listening to feminism and following it. For example, there's no study you can show me that predicts greater wealth accumulation for single women vs married couples. According to the GSS, married women report—and I quote—"significantly" higher levels of happiness, with married women with children reporting levels of happiness twice that of unmarried women.
There's literally no data you can substantiate that decision by. It's simply not true. Women (including you, apparently) are listening to feminist nonsense and acting against their own wellbeing because of it in spite of the data that overwhelmingly shows otherwise.
The data shows that married women are happier, healthier, live longer, and wealthier than unmarried women.
So exactly what data set are these women coming to their studied conclusions with?
quote:
That framing only works if you pretend history started in 1968.
No, that would be your revisionist history of women in the workforce.
quote:
When women gained the ability to support themselves, they realized they didn't necessarily need husbands to survive.
Nope. They were told by feminists that they should not depend on men to survive, and as that became more feasible they followed the nonsense.
quote:
Men aren't willing to compete as partners rather than as the default beneficiaries of women’s economic dependence.
And there it is. Men are supposed to "compete" but also be "partners." Feminism pits women against men. Christianity teaches that they are complimentary and are supposed to work together. It's kind of obvious which one you follow.
quote:
The answer appears to be: not much.
Naw. Just wealth. Health. Happiness. Longevity. Just that unimportant crap.
(I thought you were all about the studies. The studies absolutely dump on your narrative.)
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:18 pm to 4cubbies
quote:
Males are socialized to be less reflective than females. From the time they are little boys, males are told not to dwell or even acknowledge their feelings. They are told not to question their roles or responsibilities. They are told not examine power dynamics that benefit them.
I'm not sure this is true anymore. Men may not live the same "internal lives" as women do, but that doesn't mean that they are incapable of self reflection. Young men today are constantly told that every power dynamic historically benefited them, that this is a bad thing that young men should atone for, and all of that while being systematically excluded from every ladder by which society historically allowed for upward social mobility outside of the military and the high church.
Men are constantly told they're the problem. They're told the solution is just to "be better" or "get therapy" or "work on yourself". It's not that men are not introspective, it is that the public in person spaces which young men inhabit are dominated by women. It's not necessarily that men are not introspective, but that no one in those spaces want those men's perspectives. They want to have "conversations" where they preach AT the men to tell them everything they want, think, and do is wrong. They have no interest in listening to men's inner lives. So, young men flock to the few spaces they can find that at least pretend to listen to their inner lives and thoughts and mock sympathy for their concerns.
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:19 pm to Timeoday
quote:
told my son, when he is ready, I will send him to Caracas for the summer to find his bride.
Reminds me of the first episode of Modern Family.
“My village was the world wide leader in something.
“Murders.”
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:30 pm to Timeoday
quote:
I told my son, when he is ready, I will send him to Caracas for the summer to find his bride.
That seems simultaneously sad, based, expensive, and thrifty all at the same time. I'm not sure if I envy or pity your son. I did date a Filipino immigrant for a few months once, and that was definitely a positive experience. I hope your son has even better luck in South America.
This post was edited on 1/5/26 at 4:31 pm
Posted on 1/5/26 at 4:39 pm to kingbob
quote:
That seems simultaneously sad, based, expensive, and thrifty all at the same time. I'm not sure if I envy or pity your son. I did date a Filipino immigrant for a few months once, and that was definitely a positive experience. I hope your son has even better luck in South America.ica.
He will not have to fly 21 hours to get there is certainly a plus.
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