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re: Is anyone else dealing with an aging parent becoming a curmudgeon
Posted on 12/14/20 at 10:45 pm to go_tigres
Posted on 12/14/20 at 10:45 pm to go_tigres
I'm 72 & a survivor of prostate cancer, going on 2 yrs now, good health considering, as active as the virus will permit, & I have this approach to life down pat. My mantra now is "I am 72 & don't give a shite bout nuttin". Works quite well in getting me through the days. Only issue that I am aware of my sons having is that they still, at times, see me as the dad who played & coached baseball & basketball with them from their ages of 6 through highschool. But, yea, it is quite liberating.....And you mite check out the life expectancy for us old farts & back off & cut us some slack.
0
Posted on 12/14/20 at 10:49 pm to Ham And Glass
I agree with your dad.
Posted on 12/14/20 at 10:51 pm to fallguy_1978
quote:
His typical dress is a Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts, some kind of crazy socks and hiking boots.
is this not normal?
Posted on 12/14/20 at 10:55 pm to CSATiger
quote:
is this not normal?
The new Covid normal is cargo shorts with no shoes or shirt.
Posted on 12/14/20 at 11:48 pm to go_tigres
quote:
I guarandamntee, one of my boys “sets boundaries” for me, those boundaries will be shoved right where the sun don’t shine.
A lot of us old guys have a great tool for dealing with snotty, smart arse kids, it’s called a “Will”, and they are no longer in it.
Posted on 12/14/20 at 11:58 pm to madamsquirrel
quote:DAD WHY DOES HE HAVE ONE ARM
My children may be dealing with this
shhhhhh
IS IT GOING TO GROW BACK.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 4:55 am to Ham And Glass
quote:
becoming a curmudgeon
One the joys of getting old. Leave him alone.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 4:59 am to Ham And Glass
I think my carefree parents are dealing with a 45 year old curmudgeon son
Posted on 12/15/20 at 5:14 am to Ham And Glass
My wifes husband is turning into a crumudgeon and is enjoying the hell out of it...
Old people don't give a rats arse about what people think...they have lived their lives trying to live up to an impossible standard and most come to the conclusion that life is short, why worry about the opinions of others.
I don't mind lazy motherfrickers leaving their buggies in the middle of a parking lot IF we, as a society, are ok with buggies slamming into eerybodies cars when they roll downhill or the wind catches one and sets it sailing on a course of door dings through the Kroger parking lot...if we all agree this is fine then I will be on board....but most likely the first whining count will be the lazy bastard who thinks the buggies migrate from the middle of the parking lot to the inside of the store of the own volition...I personally take mine back and will take anyone's heading toward a buggy corral back to the store myself....I used it, the least I can do is return it to where I found it. I will also empty the buggy corral of 5 or 6 buggies and return them to the store on the way in...it might require 5 extra calories of energy to do so...if everyone did we would all have fewer door dings and scraped fenders...
ANd guess what...he is talking about you to your brother LOL...
Old people don't give a rats arse about what people think...they have lived their lives trying to live up to an impossible standard and most come to the conclusion that life is short, why worry about the opinions of others.
I don't mind lazy motherfrickers leaving their buggies in the middle of a parking lot IF we, as a society, are ok with buggies slamming into eerybodies cars when they roll downhill or the wind catches one and sets it sailing on a course of door dings through the Kroger parking lot...if we all agree this is fine then I will be on board....but most likely the first whining count will be the lazy bastard who thinks the buggies migrate from the middle of the parking lot to the inside of the store of the own volition...I personally take mine back and will take anyone's heading toward a buggy corral back to the store myself....I used it, the least I can do is return it to where I found it. I will also empty the buggy corral of 5 or 6 buggies and return them to the store on the way in...it might require 5 extra calories of energy to do so...if everyone did we would all have fewer door dings and scraped fenders...
ANd guess what...he is talking about you to your brother LOL...
Posted on 12/15/20 at 5:18 am to CHiPs25
quote:
We have a family business and my brother and I are running it. My dad has somewhat stepped away and stays at our lake house most of the time. He gets wild hairs up his arse and decides to come in and change everything on a whim without consulting with my brother or I. Perfect example, I went to London earlier this year (pre-Covid) and he took that opportunity to redefine all of our processes while I was out of the country. He hasn’t been in the business in years’ and it’s changed since he was last there but continues to make changes like previous years.
He is 70 and doesn’t have any hobbies or friends so he’s around more than I want him to be. Unfortunately I can’t even hang out with him without him being the “boss”. Can’t tell you the last time I had a conversation with him where it didn’t always go back to the business.
My Dad worked for me for years and we had and have a FANTASTIC relationship...the difference is I started the business and he was an employee...one who knew he could not be fired and shared in the profits and not the losses so its questionable who the boss really was....but were I in your shoes I would tell him in no uncertain terms that what he was doing was unacceptable and if he wasn't willing to accept that I would strike out on my own...or I would humor him, what I wouldn't do is spend more than about 20 minutes deciding which route I was going to take and I would be good with the decision immediately.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 5:35 am to fallguy_1978
quote:
My dad says whatever pops in his head and also wears some crazy shite these days. His typical dress is a Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts, some kind of crazy socks and hiking boots.
My father is 81, wears sweats and a t shirt and house shoes EVERYWHERE...and free balls....which is very noticeable in sweats, especially at 81 when the boys are looking for a way out and going to ground seems to be their best option. He also bathes about 3 times a week if we are lucky...and if you don't like it??? You can kiss his arse...he could care less.
This is a man who raised 3 kids by himself, worked outdoors his whole career in any and all kinds of weather, getting up at 4 am so he could get home by 330 and meet us after school....and take us to ball practice and various after school activities....and raised a grand child when my sister and her husband passed away from the time that child was 5 and he was 57 until she was grown, married and had a family of her own. If that cantankerous bastard wants to free ball in sweats and stink to high heaven he has fricking earned the right to do so and not be bitched at about it....would it be better if he wore golf clothes and showered everyday? Of course....but if he doesnt I don't love him any less....the smelly frick....
He will also say anything that comes to mind. He is a yellow dog democrat...an old school liberal racist who is convinced minorities need help because they are minorities and not quite as capable as him....we ate a waffle house not long ago and he volunteered to get the tip...not the bill, he ain'y gone completely off yet LOL...and proceeded to take a dollar and 2 quarters and lay them conspicuously on the center of the table, with no idea what the total bill was...which was about $45....when I told him the tip should be around 7 more dollars he said, loudly, cause he is deaf you know and thinks everyone is, that "a buck fifty was a lot or money to a black boy"....I of course was put out by this and my kids were stunned into silence for about 3 days....the black MAN in question laughed it off and said it was no problem...he had old parents also....I love the old bastard but he is a piece of work....and could not care less what anyone thinks.
My mother is a died in the wool trumper and is a reprobate racist...she has been tossed out of 2 nursing homes and can't get in one any longer in Atlanta for pulling this kind of stunt daily in those nursing homes...I limit the amount of time my kids are around her because she also does not care what she says and has a mean streak and will resort to violence if she gets pissed....both have suffer from dementia but Mama is far advanced....most folks would still struggle to beat daddy at checkers....
Posted on 12/15/20 at 7:08 am to Ham And Glass
My 75 year old mother in law is acting that way. She is angry all the time and speaks with zero filter. She is alienating her only daughter with insults and put downs. I call her out on her behavior on Christmas day and she thru my wife and I out of the house in a rage. Its not gonna get better I'm afraid.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 7:15 am to Ham And Glass
Sounds like your pops is right on track for being an old man. We're all well on our way.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 7:21 am to OMLandshark
quote:
I’m 32 and a little ahead of the curve on this.
I'm 36, and I started noticing it a few years ago.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 7:26 am to Ham And Glass
Sounds like my late step Dad. It began innocent enough, but reached the point that we could not be in public with him. Comments in parking lots, raising his voice to a waitress, Angry about everything.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 9:43 am to HogBalls
quote:
At least he isn’t hospitalized and constantly dropping the N bomb on the nurses and staff like mine was. I apologized to them all repeatedly but they assured me they hear it all the time from old men with cognitive decline and just shrug it off. Still embarrassing as hell
This is the only thing I’m worried about with my dad and father in law. Nice guys but they were raised in racist homes during desegregation.
I’ve never heard them speak in a way that indicates hatred but I know those tendencies are there and I’m worried about inhibitions being removed.
Posted on 12/15/20 at 10:00 am to Ham And Glass
quote:I wonder if it has something to do with old man balls always being sore
curmudgeon
Posted on 12/15/20 at 10:10 am to Ham And Glass
quote:
Later that night we went on an errand and he flashed his brights at about 1 car out of every 3 or 4 that passed. When I told him that cars just have brighter lights he said, "You think I don't know that? I'm holding these a__holes accountable. The brights are out of control these days!"
This sounds like a line from the dad on That 70s show.
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