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Started By
Message
re: Possible Tinder Rape...in BR
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:15 pm to SlowFlowPro
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:15 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
i don't believe in constantly re-living experiences and living in a victim mentality because it creates a cycle of showing signs of being a victim and attention
quote:
also our memories fade and die. forcing yourself to re-live things over and over not only attempts to stop this from occurring, but it also leads to you creating a new memory that doesn't reflect what actually happened, and if you live in a state of victimhood, the new memory will be shaded the same way
Lot of wisdom in what you say, fwiw.
0
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:16 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
i'm a child of abuse.
It's not your fault.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:16 pm to LesMiles BFF
quote:As it says, they collect a history. A history is part of a medical examination.
They aren't just there to do a medical examination.
quote:A lot. The end of that documents has a bunch of example protocols and forms that are filled out in sexual assault cases.
Apparently some questions are asked.
This post was edited on 7/30/14 at 2:20 pm
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:16 pm to CptBengal
that's why i post on here, so i lose the urge to do so irl 
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:17 pm to LSUBoo
quote:
It's not your fault.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:17 pm to SlowFlowPro
I bet you chose the wrench.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:20 pm to liz18lsu
quote:
liz18lsu
I just read your initial post where you talked about the rape. That impressed me. Sorry that happened to you and 99% of men aren't that way. Sadly you ran into one of the 1%. Kudos for driving on in life and doing what you can do.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:20 pm to liz18lsu
The guy who raped you wasn't friends with anyone in your group at the bar?
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:20 pm to Btrtigerfan
I asked myself this alot - does this man even think he raped me. Honestly, I have gone back and forth. I think he knows, but because of the word rape, he would say "Did you see what she was wearing?" "I heard her talking about sex." etc. I believe in his mind he has justified it. Then it's just he said/she said. It is a wierd position to be in, self blame for someone forcefully entering your body.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:21 pm to LSUBoo
it wasn't that bad
and my dad has somewhat mellowed so i'm not trying to put him on blast or anything
and my dad has somewhat mellowed so i'm not trying to put him on blast or anything
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:22 pm to liz18lsu
quote:
does this man even think he raped me.
were y'all even flirting beforehand?
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:22 pm to liz18lsu
quote:.
I asked myself this alot - does this man even think he raped me. Honestly, I have gone back and forth. I think he knows, but because of the word rape, he would say "Did you see what she was wearing?" "I heard her talking about sex." etc. I believe in his mind he has justified it. Then it's just he said/she said. It is a wierd position to be in, self blame for someone forcefully entering your body
wait, this dude wasn't arrested?
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:23 pm to tigerinthebueche
Nope still out there preying on women
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:24 pm to liz18lsu
quote:
And you are all correct about hospital procedure. I wasn't prepared for the sterility of it all. I needed comfort, which the female nurses provided. I understand his questions, it was the manner in which they were asked.
STAR has volunteers that go out at all times of day/night when rape is reported in a hospital.. I believe even if the person decides not to report it to the authorities.
I wonder what the protocol is to get someone get out to you when you're at the hospital because I was under the impression they went out to all hospital cases in the area.
quote:
I very strongly feel that far too many men's lives are ruined by women with a sexual regret. I stand by that.
Completely agree. Not sure why someone said I was arguing something else earlier. If anything, I have only half-assed participated in this thread because of how torn I am on the issue.
But I definitely roll my eyes as "WELL IF I WAS RAPED, I'D..." people because I'm sorry, but you just don't know. Sometimes you find yourself in a situation where it's just not in your head to flip out and fight back.
Hell, I get in a back and forth with a poster on here where all I do is defend my stance, and suddenly I'm dramatic and "on my period". So many women are conditioned not to "flip out". Ideally, if I was being raped, I'd scream for the dude to GTFO, but there are so many factors that play into it. What if he's a friend or someone you hang out with when you're with a group of friends a lot? What if he's someone you generally liked before and don't want them to hate you or think you're being an over-dramatic psycho.
Do I think a guy's life should be ruined by mixed signals? HELL TO THE NO. Sometimes, a guy truly has no idea you're "not consenting" in these situations because you're not screaming and telling him to go away.
I think women should be educated about how to make their consent clear just as much as I think men should be educated how to make sure she is consenting. Because men aren't mind readers.
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:25 pm to liz18lsu
That is a good question. We're you dressed provocatively and were you flirting beforehand?
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:25 pm to Walt OReilly
I don't think Liz is saying the tinder rapist was her rapist, walter
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:25 pm to liz18lsu
quote:
he would say "Did you see what she was wearing?" "I heard her talking about sex." etc. I believe in his mind he has justified it
Yeah, but that's what makes him dangerous. If you can justify it then you can perpetrate it again.
And frick him.
(now I'm getting mad and I don't know why)
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:27 pm to liz18lsu
Thanks for answering, and talking about it with us morons. I have never heard it told from the victims perspective before.
I do know a guy that was all, "hell yea, had sex" then next day was like "frick, them cuffs was tight!"
I do know a guy that was all, "hell yea, had sex" then next day was like "frick, them cuffs was tight!"
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:27 pm to liz18lsu
Why is this 49 pages? What happened?
Posted on 7/30/14 at 2:27 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
quote:
That is a good question. We're you dressed provocatively and were you flirting beforehand?
Huh?
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