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Started By
Message
re: Should I leave Ukraine?
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:05 am to N2daWild
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:05 am to N2daWild
Again, you keep saying ‘Ukrainians acted like nothing was going to happen’. What did you expect? They’ve lived this way forever, they are almost immune to it. It sucks, but expecting a bunch of panicking over their almost normal way of life was completely ignorant of you.
2ndly, I hope the best for your family but your wife has to be nuts to want to stay there. Visiting her son on a long vacation is one thing, but she is basically living there and visiting the USA. Even someone living around the poverty line has a better life in the USA. Not being able to convince her to leave or even marrying someone in the first place that refuses to leave us…crazy.
2ndly, I hope the best for your family but your wife has to be nuts to want to stay there. Visiting her son on a long vacation is one thing, but she is basically living there and visiting the USA. Even someone living around the poverty line has a better life in the USA. Not being able to convince her to leave or even marrying someone in the first place that refuses to leave us…crazy.
0
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:09 am to N2daWild
UPDATE:
I was able to speak with my wife this morning, thankfully. She is now staying at her parents. There are no utilities and water at the apartment and bombs are dropping near by. The apartment is fairly stocked up on supplies so she is sharing with the neighbor above our apartment, Luda, Ilena and their husband. Ilena is 15, pretty girl and very sweet with decent English, who was going to music college in the city next door that has been getting bombed since day one. Luda and Ilena would often watch our baby if we had to take the bus or taxi somewhere.
Living conditions will be much harder at her parents, especially room for the baby but they will be much safer. She is now becoming very concerned about the military taking her son to fight. He turns 16 in May. The military could also take her and her parents to work at military hospital. All Doctors are considered officers in the military, but receive no pay for this. They could volunteer to work for the military and receive better pay than what they would normally make but most choose not to. They are just concerned they will not be given a choice if things get desperate.
I told her that if there is a ceasefire allowing them to evacuate safely, she needs to leave. She can always go back later when things are safer and the IVF center opens again. I told her to bring with her anybody that wants to come with her. Anna and Micha in Kharkiv and her friend Yanna (they are without utilities now.) Anna's sister Luba in Kiev. Luda, Ilena, my wife's parents anyone that wants to leave.
Once they make it to a refugee camp, probably Poland they have two options. They can pay for their own transportation somewhere or they can wait to see where they are moved to. Option one is much better. If America agrees to start taking refugees, she can use the credit card and buy as many plane tickets as she needs to buy. Once in America, they file for asylum and then have one year to apply for permanent green card if they choose. Some may stay, some will return when it is safer. If I can get them to America, I will figure out the housing and expenses once they get here (referring to who she brings with her).
I feel a lot better now that I talked to her. I will call her again later today. If anyone has any questions they want me to ask her, let me know.
I was able to speak with my wife this morning, thankfully. She is now staying at her parents. There are no utilities and water at the apartment and bombs are dropping near by. The apartment is fairly stocked up on supplies so she is sharing with the neighbor above our apartment, Luda, Ilena and their husband. Ilena is 15, pretty girl and very sweet with decent English, who was going to music college in the city next door that has been getting bombed since day one. Luda and Ilena would often watch our baby if we had to take the bus or taxi somewhere.
Living conditions will be much harder at her parents, especially room for the baby but they will be much safer. She is now becoming very concerned about the military taking her son to fight. He turns 16 in May. The military could also take her and her parents to work at military hospital. All Doctors are considered officers in the military, but receive no pay for this. They could volunteer to work for the military and receive better pay than what they would normally make but most choose not to. They are just concerned they will not be given a choice if things get desperate.
I told her that if there is a ceasefire allowing them to evacuate safely, she needs to leave. She can always go back later when things are safer and the IVF center opens again. I told her to bring with her anybody that wants to come with her. Anna and Micha in Kharkiv and her friend Yanna (they are without utilities now.) Anna's sister Luba in Kiev. Luda, Ilena, my wife's parents anyone that wants to leave.
Once they make it to a refugee camp, probably Poland they have two options. They can pay for their own transportation somewhere or they can wait to see where they are moved to. Option one is much better. If America agrees to start taking refugees, she can use the credit card and buy as many plane tickets as she needs to buy. Once in America, they file for asylum and then have one year to apply for permanent green card if they choose. Some may stay, some will return when it is safer. If I can get them to America, I will figure out the housing and expenses once they get here (referring to who she brings with her).
I feel a lot better now that I talked to her. I will call her again later today. If anyone has any questions they want me to ask her, let me know.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:16 am to N2daWild
Sorry for the problems, but when you see something like this coming, get out of the way.
Bombs and bullets don’t discriminate.
Bombs and bullets don’t discriminate.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:17 am to N2daWild
I’m curious about the news that they are getting if any.
I’m so glad that she’s safe at this point and that y’all have a plan. Praying for corridors out and good for you for telling her to bring who’re r wants to come and I hope her son isn’t forced to fight.
I’m so glad that she’s safe at this point and that y’all have a plan. Praying for corridors out and good for you for telling her to bring who’re r wants to come and I hope her son isn’t forced to fight.
This post was edited on 3/4/22 at 7:18 am
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:17 am to N2daWild
Don’t beat yourself up over past decisions. You only had the information available at the time and made a reasonable decision based on that. Don’t worry about the arm chair quarterbacks in this thread acting like they are Rambo, and don’t let them pressure you into making a bad move now.
The most important thing at this point is getting them supplies and getting them to a safe place. Is it too late for them to relocate to the western part of Ukraine? Maybe you could meet them there , but I think you meeting them At the border or another city is more doable than you getting in and finding them. Is there a way to get them money or food? That to me is the concern right now. I’m sure we could raise some money here for you a flight and lodging and supplies if there’s a reasonable plan.
Just saw the update. Sounds like your best option. Also you should set up a go fund me or something to get some help.
The most important thing at this point is getting them supplies and getting them to a safe place. Is it too late for them to relocate to the western part of Ukraine? Maybe you could meet them there , but I think you meeting them At the border or another city is more doable than you getting in and finding them. Is there a way to get them money or food? That to me is the concern right now. I’m sure we could raise some money here for you a flight and lodging and supplies if there’s a reasonable plan.
Just saw the update. Sounds like your best option. Also you should set up a go fund me or something to get some help.
This post was edited on 3/4/22 at 7:26 am
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:22 am to N2daWild
Why do you keep harping on the stupid IVF center. Who cares about that. I hope they all stay safe
Posted on 3/4/22 at 7:26 am to Cracker
Sounds like his wife is the one harping on that. It’s the whole reason she wouldn’t leave.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 8:26 am to N2daWild
Hope they all get out soon.
I could possibly provide a place for Anna,Yanna or Mischa.
Edit: That is one fine baby girl there. Your wife must be beautiful.
Good Luck to all.
I could possibly provide a place for Anna,Yanna or Mischa.
Edit: That is one fine baby girl there. Your wife must be beautiful.
Good Luck to all.
This post was edited on 3/4/22 at 8:34 am
Posted on 3/4/22 at 8:33 am to EvrybodysAllAmerican
quote:
go fund
I missed several pages in the middle of the thread. Is there a GFM?
Posted on 3/4/22 at 8:45 am to Meauxjeaux
I empathize but this was self inflicted. There was 0 chance that IVF center would stay open and the wife chose to stay for selfish reasons
Bald and bankrupt was on a train last Friday or Saturday. She should’ve been doing it as well
Bald and bankrupt was on a train last Friday or Saturday. She should’ve been doing it as well
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:02 am to tiger91
quote:
I’m curious about the news that they are getting if any.
She has had internet this whole time, accept for yesterday. It is much easier for her to listen in Russian and Ukrainian language, so that is the news she watches. Unfortunately she gets a lot of Russian and Ukrainian propaganda and believes too much of it.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:08 am to EvrybodysAllAmerican
quote:
Is it too late for them to relocate to the Western part of Ukraine?
Its not safe for them to move. They are much safer hunkered down. I am hoping Ukraine and Russia will negotiate a ceasefire to evacuate civilians. The refugees that evacuated previously, (including Sean Penn) had a horrible go of it.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:09 am to N2daWild
Sorry if I missed it - have her opinions changed at all since it started? I believe her previous stance was that she obviously didn't support war but was pro-Russia.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:13 am to EvrybodysAllAmerican
quote:
Is there a way to get them money or food?
They are in pretty good shape. They haven't been able to withdraw from the ATM for several days but have been able to use my credit card at the groceries. That probably ended yesterday, but they have been stacking up all week. Her parents probably have a good amount of cash, a garden, chickens, ducks and rabbits and the neighbor has a well. A bigger problem will be trying to cook without utilities. A bag of rice, potatoes, eggs, meat all need to be heated somehow. As of now the parents have utilities, so they are okay.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:25 am to Cracker
quote:
Why do you keep harping on the stupid IVF center.
This is very important to my wife. We already have one IVF child who just turned one years old. My wife is 40 and the window is closing. She wants my daughter to have a sibling. As older parents she knows we won't be in her life as long as some parents. I will be 72 but time she is 20. So she wants her to have a sibling when we are gone.
5 days after this war started they were still open in Kiev and my wife was calling. They are now closed now. She was thinking that Russia would take Kiev quickly and eventually people would go back to work and school. I think she was holding out hope she could go on with the process in April or May. Kiev is holding out and getting more destroyed by the day. My frozen sperm in Kiev could be destroyed by now.
She needs to get out. If and when they reopen we can go back together, assuming Americans will be allowed in if it is Russian occupied.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:29 am to Bigfishchoupique
quote:
I could possibly provide a place for Anna,Yanna or Mischa.
Thank you. I don't know Yanna but Anna and Mischa I know very well. They speak English and are very nice and considerate. She has a husband, Genna, but they won't let him leave in case he gets drafted. I don't know who will follow her out or when, assuming she can even get out. I will figure all of that out then.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:32 am to Meauxjeaux
quote:
Is there a GFM?
Just the good wishes, prayers and support are enough. I don't know what I will be facing financially if a bunch of them evacuate as refugees. I know her Aunt in Miami will help me with plane tickets and I know my family will help me here.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:46 am to Pettifogger
quote:
have her opinions changed at all since it started? I believe her previous stance was that she obviously didn't support war but was pro-Russia.
Not really. She wants Ukraine to have their independence and wants Russia to leave. That being said, she mentioned the standard of living was better before 2014 when they were under a puppet Pro-Russian President. Not to mention she is getting a lot Russian propaganda right now.
Politically speaking I don't think she would care either way, Pro-Russian or Pro-European. Much of Lisichansk probably feels the same way. Kiev is a different story.
That being said, if Russia takes over the government now it would just cause problems for us. Traveling there in the future for me especially. We are working with the Ukrainian government right now to get my daughter dual citizenship. Who knows what will happen with the IVF center.
The best thing that could happen for us and probably everyone else is is Russia would negotiate a withdrawal. Give Putin Donetsk and Lugansk that don't want to be part of Ukraine anyway. Putin could save face, the Russian population would probably support that, Lugansk and Donetsk would say he is a hero. Not to mention the civil war Ukraine has been fighting at a stalemate for the last 8 years would be over.
The problem is, the public rarely knows all the facts. What kind of shady deals are being negotiated behind the scenes?
Posted on 3/4/22 at 9:49 am to N2daWild
I really do hope they all get out of there when an opportunity presents itself and get out of Ukraine completely. Parents and son included. I don't know if his father is in the picture, but if he is then frick him. If they can get the boy to Poland and eventually to the US, do it.
Posted on 3/4/22 at 10:01 am to N2daWild
Have you tried wiring money to her bank in Ukraine? She could use the funds to evacuate to Poland, as it seems that is where the majority of the refugees are going. It would be a long and difficult trip, especially with the baby, but sometimes money is just the right substance to grease certain wheels.
Please check out the information on the US Embassy in Ukraine and Humanitarian Assistance from the US Embassy in Poland.
Good Luck, OP. I'll keep you in my prayers.
Please check out the information on the US Embassy in Ukraine and Humanitarian Assistance from the US Embassy in Poland.
Good Luck, OP. I'll keep you in my prayers.
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