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Posted on 11/14/15 at 10:07 pm to rebeloke
quote:
No privileges - those are earned.
This.
Take away stuff they care about. Phone, computer games, etc. Then tell them they have to do their part to get them back, go to school, make good grades (they have to make the effort). And you have to do your part, follow through with threats to take this stuff away, etc. Tell them you love them and it's their choice to not live up to their obligations. Tell them they have all the power, now they need to make up their minds on what they want to do; keep screwing up or make a real effort to do their part (then they can get the stuff they care about back). There are repercussions for choices they make in life, Mom and Dad are not going to always be there to make everything ok. If you've already raised spoiled shits, you're out of luck. Hard knocks and maturity will have to straighten them out.
Posted on 11/15/15 at 3:33 am to rebeloke
Sounds like he's just being a teenager? Teens go through phases, it's called puberty...
#1. Sit down with him and have an actual concerned parent conversation with him. You never know what could be going through his mind at that age. You simply showing interest or concern for him could completely change things. Father/Son communication is much more valuable than most parents realize.
#2. Ignore the idiots telling you to "beat it out of him". They have zero rational parenting ability and immediately resort to violence, because they ignorantly think that it's the answer to everything. It could cause resentment and make things worse (there is a time and a place for arse-whippings, save that for some serious intervention)
#3. Remember that mistakes are a part of growing up and learning to be a better person. People have seemed to "forget" that when they were teens they made mistakes, which in turn taught them a lesson that made them a better person. Kids aren't allowed to just be kids anymore, it's actually kinda pathetic. We expect them to be adults when they are 13 yrs old. You can't force him to see things a certain way, you have to guide him and hope that he can make those right and wrong decisions on his own.
This will probably not go over well... But rational thinking rarely does on here... Good Luck!
#1. Sit down with him and have an actual concerned parent conversation with him. You never know what could be going through his mind at that age. You simply showing interest or concern for him could completely change things. Father/Son communication is much more valuable than most parents realize.
#2. Ignore the idiots telling you to "beat it out of him". They have zero rational parenting ability and immediately resort to violence, because they ignorantly think that it's the answer to everything. It could cause resentment and make things worse (there is a time and a place for arse-whippings, save that for some serious intervention)
#3. Remember that mistakes are a part of growing up and learning to be a better person. People have seemed to "forget" that when they were teens they made mistakes, which in turn taught them a lesson that made them a better person. Kids aren't allowed to just be kids anymore, it's actually kinda pathetic. We expect them to be adults when they are 13 yrs old. You can't force him to see things a certain way, you have to guide him and hope that he can make those right and wrong decisions on his own.
This will probably not go over well... But rational thinking rarely does on here... Good Luck!
Posted on 11/15/15 at 7:04 am to rebeloke
How do you know it's not drugs?
Posted on 11/15/15 at 7:12 am to CorkSoaker
You have a point but I got to thinking that there is no way this kid is mine. DNA test just came back. I was right.
Naw. Jk
Naw. Jk
Posted on 11/15/15 at 7:25 am to rebeloke
Send them on a cruise. After they get back, they'll appreciate what they have at home.
Posted on 11/15/15 at 8:35 am to rebeloke
It starts with parenting imo. Do you enable?
Lay out expectations and then sit down with your child and go over tthe expectations with them. Then let the kid have input as to what the punishment will be for not meeting expectations. After you agree on them, put the list of expectations on the fridge for all to see as a reminder.
This may or may not work for you....but in our case it has worked out perfectly.
Lay out expectations and then sit down with your child and go over tthe expectations with them. Then let the kid have input as to what the punishment will be for not meeting expectations. After you agree on them, put the list of expectations on the fridge for all to see as a reminder.
This may or may not work for you....but in our case it has worked out perfectly.
Posted on 11/15/15 at 8:59 am to partsman103
Give him the business end of your belt
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