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re: wife apparently cheated on husband 20 years ago before marriage

Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:32 pm to
Posted by RogerTheShrubber
Juneau, AK
Member since Jan 2009
298305 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:32 pm to
quote:

Dating sucks in your 40s btw


That was actually the best time for me. It was crazy.

Probably different for women though.
Posted by 777Tiger
Member since Mar 2011
90600 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:33 pm to
quote:

“I’m convinced that dating in your 40s is like digging through the bargain bin at Walmart just trying to find the least damage item that someone else missed”



good description sort of like going to a used tire store or a "U Pick 'Em" for auto parts
Posted by EA6B
TX
Member since Dec 2012
14754 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:34 pm to
quote:

I’m convinced that dating in your 40s is like digging through the bargain bin at Walmart just trying to find the least damage item that someone else missed”


For me, and many of my friends, being divorced, and single in our 40s was the greatest time iour lives.
Posted by 777Tiger
Member since Mar 2011
90600 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:36 pm to
quote:

That was actually the best time for me.


except it was really fricking, not dating, right?
Posted by NawlinsTiger9
Where the mongooses roam
Member since Jan 2009
39274 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:45 pm to
quote:

I've never subscribed to the "once a cheater, always a cheater" theory. I've had friends who cheated, realized they fricked up and the grass wasn't greener and they vowed to never cheat again.


Yep

Any sweeping, absolutism about people’s behavior - particularly in matters of the heart - is generally poor advice.
Posted by 777Tiger
Member since Mar 2011
90600 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:48 pm to
quote:

Any sweeping, absolutism about people’s behavior - particularly in matters of the heart - is generally poor advice.



disagree, infidelity to me is the only "one strike you're out" commandment in my book, I can put up with most anything else, but you cross that line and we're done
Posted by Stealth Matrix
29°59'55.98"N 90°05'21.85"W
Member since Aug 2019
11438 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 1:56 pm to
quote:

At the time she cheated on me we were going to the pastor at her parents church for premarital counseling.

Sounds like someone didn't want to wait til marriage.
Posted by NawlinsTiger9
Where the mongooses roam
Member since Jan 2009
39274 posts
Posted on 6/19/21 at 3:37 pm to
quote:

infidelity to me is the only "one strike you're out" commandment in my book, I can put up with most anything else, but you cross that line and we're done




I don’t necessarily disagree with that

I’m just saying that if a 20-something person cheats on their partner once, it’s not some golden rule that they’ll be a cheater in every relationship from then on.

There are plenty of repeat offenders, and it’s an awful thing to do to someone, but people can change and grow out of it.
Posted by EuphoricSSP
Member since Feb 2021
822 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 4:39 pm to
quote:

I bet she gives good head, the married ones always want a big one with no strings attached.


quote:

You’re either 12 or an incel



Thats why I wrote it like that but naw I get my fair share of good pussy
Posted by Ralph_Wiggum
Sugarland
Member since Jul 2005
11067 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:09 pm to
quote:

At the time she cheated on me we were going to the pastor at her parents church for premarital counseling. I was living in our first house and working my first job about a hundred miles away from her. She was still in college and living with her parents.


The first problem is seeing the "pastor" for premarital counseling. That is a Ned Flanders thing to do. I mean do you actually think the "pastor" is qualified? I mean memorizing the Bible doesn't make you a marriage counselor.
Posted by Pierre
Baton Rouge
Member since Nov 2005
5428 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:16 pm to
I believe some religions require pre marital counseling to get married in the church. Not an expert or holy roller but a little God in your life doesn’t hurt. Their church their rules.

Posted by Ralph_Wiggum
Sugarland
Member since Jul 2005
11067 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:17 pm to
quote:

He needs to start a divorce now, this wasn't the only time and if he has kids he should get a paternity test. If he is scared of dying alone and miserable that will happen regardless if he stays.




Most men get screwed over in divorce. He pays the bills and gets to see his kids every other weekend and on Tuesday nights. Men never get their money's worth in a divorce. You have to move out and she's the one who cheated on you. You get to live in some shitty apartment while you're paying for your wife to enjoy the same lifestyle she enjoyed while you were married.
Posted by tiggerthetooth
Big Momma's House
Member since Oct 2010
64275 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:18 pm to
quote:

The first problem is seeing the "pastor" for premarital counseling. That is a Ned Flanders thing to do. I mean do you actually think the "pastor" is qualified? I mean memorizing the Bible doesn't make you a marriage counselor.




Ralph, your ignorance of church, pastors, and Christianity couldn't be more obvious. Ned Flanders? Really?


You know he's supposed to be a comedic stereotype, right?
This post was edited on 6/20/21 at 5:18 pm
Posted by GreenRockTiger
vortex to the whirlpool of despair
Member since Jun 2020
60009 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:19 pm to
quote:

I believe some religions require pre marital counseling to get married in the church. Not an expert or holy roller but a little God in your life doesn’t hurt. Their church their rules.


Very true - if the pastors are actually educated in ‘pastoring’ they take a lot of psychology type courses - and of course that doesn’t mean they know everything but it’s not like they’re reading tarot cards or throwing chicken bones
Posted by IceTiger
Really hot place
Member since Oct 2007
26584 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:27 pm to
quote:

The first problem is seeing the "pastor" for premarital counseling. That is a Ned Flanders thing to do. I mean do you actually think the "pastor" is qualified? I mean memorizing the Bible doesn't make you a marriage counselor


That's stupid.

Anyone that errs to the wise can be a counselor for someone. That's some pinheaded shite that's wrong with society.
Posted by Ralph_Wiggum
Sugarland
Member since Jul 2005
11067 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:27 pm to
quote:

Ralph, your ignorance of church, pastors, and Christianity couldn't be more obvious. Ned Flanders? Really?


You know he's supposed to be a comedic stereotype, right?


I am Christian. I am Roman Catholic. Went to Catholic Schools and I am a believer.

It doesn't matter if it's Father O'Brien, Jerry Fallwell Jr. Pat Robertson, Joel Osteen, Rick Warren, Benny Hinn, TD Yakes or John Ankerberg. You really think Rick Warren or John Ankerberg is the best person for premarital counseling? I mean they can tell you what the Bible says and that is about it.
Posted by LSUBoo
Knoxville, TN
Member since Mar 2006
103822 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:28 pm to
quote:

wife apparently cheated


Bye, Felicia.
Posted by KAHog
South Trough
Member since Mar 2013
2903 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:43 pm to
Would be more worried if she said Hernandez...
Posted by Jake88
Member since Apr 2005
79237 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 5:55 pm to
quote:


The first problem is seeing the "pastor" for premarital counseling. That is a Ned Flanders thing to do. I mean do you actually think the "pastor" is qualified?
What if he's an LMFT?
Posted by Pierre
Baton Rouge
Member since Nov 2005
5428 posts
Posted on 6/20/21 at 6:25 pm to
quote:

I mean they can tell you what the Bible says and that is about it.


I think that’s the point. They aren’t doing a psych study or anything.

Edit and just joking but which on touched you lol
This post was edited on 6/20/21 at 6:27 pm
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