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Posted on 2/26/26 at 8:56 am to bleuman
My wife was hot and asked me to blow on her.
Honestly, I am not a fan.
My wife said I am the cheapest person she knows.
I am not buying it.
Did you hear about the guy who evaporated?
He will be mist.
I have two dogs, Rolex and Timex.
They are both watchdogs.
There is a concert that only costs 45 cents.
It is 50 cent featuring nickleback.
Honestly, I am not a fan.
My wife said I am the cheapest person she knows.
I am not buying it.
Did you hear about the guy who evaporated?
He will be mist.
I have two dogs, Rolex and Timex.
They are both watchdogs.
There is a concert that only costs 45 cents.
It is 50 cent featuring nickleback.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 8:58 am to bleuman
What's brown and rhymes with snoop?
Dr Dre
Dr Dre
Posted on 2/26/26 at 9:09 am to TDTOM
quote:I
There is a concert that only costs 45 cents. It is 50 cent featuring nickleback.
too hard at this one 
Posted on 2/26/26 at 9:12 am to bleuman
What’s the biggest difference between snow men and snow women?
Snow balls
Snow balls
Posted on 2/26/26 at 9:19 am to Kadjin
A storm blew off 25% of my roof last night.
Oof.
I gave a bunch of sugar to the hero from Legend of Zelda. He ran around until he turned blue.
He was a hyperlink.
Oof.
I gave a bunch of sugar to the hero from Legend of Zelda. He ran around until he turned blue.
He was a hyperlink.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 9:24 am to CaptainsWafer
quote:
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn’t matter, he aint coming.
The best lead in to that one is "What do you call a cow with no legs?"
Ground Beef.
Did you know you can make a cat sound like a dog?
Dip him in gas and flick a match...he'll go "WOOOFFF!"
Posted on 2/26/26 at 10:45 am to AwesomeSauce
When is a car not a car?
when it turns into a drive way
Why do cows lie down in the rain?
To keep each udder dry
Why dont ghost make good magicians?
Because you can see right through them
when it turns into a drive way
Why do cows lie down in the rain?
To keep each udder dry
Why dont ghost make good magicians?
Because you can see right through them
Posted on 2/26/26 at 10:51 am to Cuz413
I was looking for the IT guy, but i guess he ransomware
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:05 am to bleuman
quote:
What do you call a disabled supermodel?
Peggy
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:06 am to bleuman
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to stupids house.
Knock knock. Who’s there?
Chicken.
To get to stupids house.
Knock knock. Who’s there?
Chicken.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:11 am to bleuman
Hear what happened to the Italian chef?
He pasta way
He pasta way
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:12 am to Pezzo
quote:
I was looking for the IT guy, but i guess he ransomware
Need that on a billboard in front of UMMC in Jackson.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:16 am to bleuman
quote:
Why didn't Anne Frank finish her diary? ...concentration problems
This seems more of a dark holocaust joke lol
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:17 am to bleuman
I love telling dad jokes.
Sometimes he laughs.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:20 am to bleuman
1)
Dad is awaiting to see his son after birth. When he meets the doctor he says that part of his eyelid on one eye has a skin defect.
The Dad asks the doctor, "What can we do?"
Doctor says, "Well, after we circumcised him, we used some of that skin and used it for his eyelid".
Dad says, "Well, will it work and he will be ok?"
Doctor says, "Yeah, he will be just fine, just a little cock-eyed"
2)
What did the sign at the closed brothel say?
"BEAT IT! WE'RE CLOSED"
Dad is awaiting to see his son after birth. When he meets the doctor he says that part of his eyelid on one eye has a skin defect.
The Dad asks the doctor, "What can we do?"
Doctor says, "Well, after we circumcised him, we used some of that skin and used it for his eyelid".
Dad says, "Well, will it work and he will be ok?"
Doctor says, "Yeah, he will be just fine, just a little cock-eyed"
2)
What did the sign at the closed brothel say?
"BEAT IT! WE'RE CLOSED"
This post was edited on 2/26/26 at 11:20 am
Posted on 2/26/26 at 11:20 am to bleuman
What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a plus.
Technically this is a Texas Aggie joke, but in honor of my dad. He loved those Aggie jokes.
Why don’t Texas Aggies eat M&Ms? Because they are too hard to peel.
Technically this is a Texas Aggie joke, but in honor of my dad. He loved those Aggie jokes.
Why don’t Texas Aggies eat M&Ms? Because they are too hard to peel.
This post was edited on 2/26/26 at 11:26 am
Posted on 2/26/26 at 12:10 pm to bleuman
Anyone want to hear a good potassium joke?
k
k
Posted on 2/26/26 at 12:19 pm to bleuman
What was Helen Keller’s favorite color? Cordaroy.
Posted on 2/26/26 at 1:27 pm to bleuman
What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?
Dam
Dam
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