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re: Gaming addiction ...this is a epidemic
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:39 am to ApexTiger
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:39 am to ApexTiger
I'll be honest, excessive gaming is nothing more than escaping something in your life. It drowns out negative aspects you aren't happy with. Have you talked to him about it? Once he gets to college, he won't make good grades as he'll have complete freedom to game as often as he wants to.
3
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:41 am to tigerinthebueche
quote:A bit heavy handed, but this is basically correct based on the info given by the OP in this thread IMO.
WTF? He pushes back? You’re the father. Act like it.
He pushes back?
Put that motherfricker in his place and let him know you’re the parent and he’s the child. He does what he’s told to do.
He pushes back?
This is the biggest problem you have. Your wife too since she wants you to be more assertive. Quit being such a pussy and make him stop playing when YOU say stop. Be the head of the household and discipline your kid. He needs it, your wife wants it, and you are obligated to do it.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:42 am to ApexTiger
quote:Now this is a bit different for me. It's not the middle of the day. He's 15 and doesn't have school the next day AND it's 10:55 at night? Let him play all he wants, unless he has to be awake super early the next day.
On the 5 minutes issue, I try to let him finish the game he started instead making him stop immediately...
I went to bed...it was 10:55
Then the wife comes upstairs and gets on him and then wakes me to lay into me about being tougher.
I asked him what happened to the 5 minutes?
He said "we stayed alive, I didn't start a new game"
He's on school break the next 2 weeks... my wife works tomorrow.
I was ticked I was taking the flack from my wife over this.
That's where you gotta step in and tell your wife step back a bit.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:42 am to ApexTiger
I was crushing beers and attempting to crush poon at 15, I’d say you have a lot less to worry about than you think
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:42 am to ApexTiger
How about you actually fricking parent? What the frick is wrong with you people ?
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:43 am to BrohemAlem11
Te OT’s inability to realize that different people have different hobbies is amazing. Some people are never going to enjoy the outdoors, it’s ok if your child is one of them.
Maybe he would be into playing an instrument, or drawing, or whatever. The idea that oh should force your kid to do something simply because you think it’s “the one thing everybody likes or does” is crazy.
You say he gets good grades so he is getting his homework done (presumably). Heis playing with friends (from school presumably), so he is socializing and building bonds with his peers. Then unless he is skipping chores or something, what is the problem? If he needs better time management, use an internet blocker. If you just disapprove of his hobby choices, well maybe it’s time to get over it.
I also love the notion of a bunch of people who spend significant amounts of free time posting on a message board (and probably watching TV) being upset their kids are way into electronics.
Maybe he would be into playing an instrument, or drawing, or whatever. The idea that oh should force your kid to do something simply because you think it’s “the one thing everybody likes or does” is crazy.
You say he gets good grades so he is getting his homework done (presumably). Heis playing with friends (from school presumably), so he is socializing and building bonds with his peers. Then unless he is skipping chores or something, what is the problem? If he needs better time management, use an internet blocker. If you just disapprove of his hobby choices, well maybe it’s time to get over it.
I also love the notion of a bunch of people who spend significant amounts of free time posting on a message board (and probably watching TV) being upset their kids are way into electronics.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:49 am to AUsteriskPride
quote:
I'll be honest, excessive gaming is nothing more than escaping something in your life.
Nothing wrong with a kid who likes to spend a lot of his/her free time gaming. It's when it's about all they do it's a problem. It can be an addiction like many other activities.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:55 am to Dick Leverage
Only thing I know about Fortnight is that this new girl I've been seeing left her husband because he became obsessed with it. A lot of the kids on my little league team that I coach have been talking about it too.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:56 am to YoungManOldMan
quote:
People out here dealing with opioid addiction and you can’t take away an Xbox?
No shite. The kid gets good grades, so who gives a frick? This isn't ruining lives.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:56 am to el Gaucho
quote:
At least he isn't one of those weird kids that looks at an iPad in a restaurant.
This post was edited on 3/5/18 at 9:57 am
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:56 am to AUsteriskPride
Honestly game consoles are much better than iPads. My friend is a child psychiatrist and he calls them psychopads. All the kids that come in for future serial killer behavior like starting fires and hurting other kids the parents basically just let them look at an iPad when they went places instead of loving them and talking to them
Posted on 3/5/18 at 9:58 am to ApexTiger
It sounds like your wife is just a bitch tbh.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:01 am to ApexTiger
Allow him like 1-2 hours per day, if he doesn't like it then tell him you'll take it away altogether. I'm not a parent, but I'm pretty sure the kid always capitulates in the end.
Side note, epidemic probably isn't the best word choice for a problem you have with your kid
Side note, epidemic probably isn't the best word choice for a problem you have with your kid
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:02 am to OMLandshark
quote:The idea that because a kid has good grades he should just play as many video games as he wants is a bit odd.
No shite. The kid gets good grades, so who gives a frick? This isn't ruining lives.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:03 am to el Gaucho
quote:No you don't.
At least he isn't one of those weird kids that looks at an iPad in a restaurant. When I see one of those dorks I usually complain to management
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:09 am to WestlakeTiger
quote:
How about you actually fricking parent? What the frick is wrong with you people ?
So fricking stupid! What does that even mean? OP, like me, basically admitted that the kid does what he's supposed to. He's got good grades, some extracurriculars, behaves well, etc...
But his preferred method of fun is drastically different then what we did as kids, or what some of the other kids are doing. So where is his lack of "parenting" coming in? B/c we perceive riding bikes and digging in ditches to be more rewarding for his development than 1 hour of gaming? Why?
Most parents tend to parent based on their own personal life experiences. But there are things available now that weren't available to us. That doesn't' make them inherently worse/better. Just like the shite we did isn't necessarily worse/better. I think it's fighting a losing battle to try and turn your kid into what YOU imagine they should be, and enjoy, as children.
This post was edited on 3/5/18 at 10:13 am
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:11 am to AUsteriskPride
quote:
Once he gets to college, he won't make good grades as he'll have complete freedom to game as often as he wants to.
The experience of my kids is the complete opposite of what you are describing.
They struggled in school. Taking away video games didn’t work. It appeared as though they just didn’t care about academic performance, and there was no good way to make them care (we seemingly tried everything).
Now that they are in college, one is on the Dean’s list and still gaming. The other is on track to being admitted at UT. He is gaming less, but adapted and is soaring academically.
So I view it as a coping strategy.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:14 am to shel311
quote:
The idea that because a kid has good grades he should just play as many video games as he wants is a bit odd.
The thing is, kids playing a lot of video games today isn't exactly abnormal behavior. If it's the worst thing he's dealing with he should consider himself lucky. He's still yet to convey what harm is being done other than he and his wife don't like it.
Yeah I played outside a lot as a young child but that's because I couldn't play video games. I wouldn't say I'm any better off for it.
Take the games away and he'll rebel big time. He'll just find another way to play.
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:16 am to Goldrush25
quote:
He's still yet to convey what harm is being done other than he and his wife don't like it.
I have to remind myself of this regularly. "It's bothering me, not harming him."
Posted on 3/5/18 at 10:17 am to el Gaucho
quote:
My friend is a child psychiatrist and he calls them psychopads. All the kids that come in for future serial killer behavior like starting fires and hurting other kids the parents basically just let them look at an iPad when they went places instead of loving them and talking to them
Separate correlation from causation.
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